want your teen to stop comparing? start here.
Do you ever scroll and feel like everyone else has it more “together” than you?
That comparison game doesn’t just live in our adult world—it’s alive and well in our teens’ lives too. While you might be comparing homes, vacations, or finances, your teen is likely comparing grades, looks, friends, or sports. Different categories, same weight on the heart.
I know how heavy that can feel—for both us and them.
But here’s the truth ⤵
When we stop comparing our journey (and when we help our teens do the same), something shifts:
→ We begin to feel gratitude for our own path and what we already have.
→ We model what it looks like to give ourselves credit instead of judgment.
→ Our teens see us living it—and they learn to do the same.
Why comparison gets in the way
Comparison blocks both parents and teens from:
noticing real progress,
celebrating what’s working,
and confidently moving forward.
Those heavy feelings—jealousy, envy, frustration—aren’t here to shame us. They’re signals showing us what we deeply desire and what’s possible for us (and for our kids).
How to guide your teen out of the comparison spiral
It starts with us. Teens learn more from what we model than from what we lecture.
✨ Shift the focus back to your own journey.
✨ Talk out loud about your wins, even small ones.
✨ Remind your teen that social media is a highlight reel, not real life.
When you reclaim your power from comparison, your teen sees you practicing what you hope they’ll learn: gratitude, resilience, and self-worth.
Try this with your teen:
💫 Ask each other these questions:
What is already working well in my life right now?
Where can I give myself credit for progress I’ve made?
What is this comparison showing me that I actually want?
Sometimes, the simple act of asking together creates connection—and gives your teen permission to be honest about how comparison shows up for them.
Helping our teens break free from comparison starts with us showing them how. The more we practice gratitude for our own lives, the more we create space for them to do the same.
This week, commit to catching yourself in moments of comparison— pause, reframe, and choose gratitude instead.
And if you’d like more support navigating the challenges of parenting teens—from comparison traps to communication struggles—I’d love to connect with you. Schedule a free discovery call with me and let’s talk about how coaching can support both you and your teen.
